It has been 5 years since I have been doing business and dealing with various kinds of people from govt. employees to business tycoons to downright cheats. Every time I get my finger burnt, I just think about how can I avoid such things in the future. I have learnt something, and I want to share it with you.
Every person is unique and they behave in a certain way. If they behave in a honest, intellectual and ethical way, it is a win-win for both parties involved in the deal (considering we are in the good side). There are some people who will not be honest, ethical, punctual and sensible even if it is going to harm them – they just don’t know how to behave any better and there is nothing you can do about it except avoid such relationships.
Fortunately there are some signals which will give indication to who they really are. These signals are subtle but you can pick it up if you watch closely enough. Many times I have ignored these signals of incongruent behaviour and tried to talk myself out of it. All such deals went bad wasting time, energy and money.
Signals to Watch Out for in New Professional Relationships:
The following -ve signals are subtle but important and there is a high chance that deals will go bad with the person emitting these signals. You can pick this up and terminate any deals before they are inked.
- Not returning calls or emails in a timely manner
- Not being clear about what they want from the deal
- Asking for help early on with or without promise of future reciprocation
- White lies and bluffing (example: about their pets, family, recent purchase and so on)
- Not being punctual for meetings
- White lies for not being punctual for meetings
- Unrealistic promises about service to be provided
These are the signals which we easily ignore because there is a part of our mind that always tries to think that people are going to be 100% honest, ethical, well meaning and full of common sense.
Unfortunately there are at least around 50% people in this world who are just jerks and they can come across you in life no matter how good of a person you are. Unless you watch out for these jerks and sharks, you will be in for a bad spell.
And one more thing…
Things are not so different for personal relationships. They just emit different kinds of signals, but those signals are always there. And personal relationships are not limited to romantic relationships. You get the point. We all have had that stupid friend who turned into a distant memory that you don’t want to recollect!